Motherhood as dharma

Dearest friends. I hope you are all well and transitioning happily into Spring… or the sweet promise of its arrival.

Motherhood has kept me quiet on here of late, and instead of apologise – the usual reflex – I will simply say that work, caring for my baba and generally expanding into new areas of myself within these roles has kept me busy, showing up fully where I can, and consciously not showing up at all where I cannot do so meaningfully.

You may have already received news on my new Women’s and Motherhood Mentoring programme. This is an offering which has been in development for a while, an organic move onward from nutrition and holistic wellness, as I feel a deep and juicy call to work more closely, and long-term, with women on this sacred path of empowerment, self-discovery and healing. Work with my wonderful spring clients is underway and it is an absolute joy and honour to be meeting with my sisters in this new and very personal format.

In other news, Ben and I have started to offer live meditations on Instagram on Sunday night at 7.30pm UK time. After a potent day of healing and rejuvenation in Glastonbury last weekend, I felt that it was an important way to use social media and harness its powers of unity and togetherness, so do join us if you feel the call.

I recently posted an Instagram about dharma, or the path of service, and wanted to share it / expand upon it here since it seemed to touch many people. Our own journey raising Sasha is only 14 months long so far, and yet I feel that having turned the one year mark I was able to gain yet a little more precious perspective surrounding what it really means to be a Mother, a guardian, a woman and wife at this time of life. It’s also the time when we may be weaning a little more, rooting for some more sleep, welcoming back a more regular menstrual cycle, and hoping to come up for air as it were personally, romantically, physically, socially, emotionally and professionally. And yet of course, anyone with two, three, four more years under their belt will tell us it’s only really just beginning. That’s the beauty of the journey: it really is the journey that counts. If we waited for a destination, a problem-free age, a golden point at which we would – what? feel less tired? not worry so much about our babes? no longer have them suckling magically at our breasts? no longer snuggle them up tight at night? be able to have more than an hour all to ourselves? have an empty house and wonder where the years went? – our sense of fulfilment will always be future-oriented. And it’s deceptive. For whatever we think we need or crave, the present moment of parenthood provides us with it right here, right now. Constant and often unglamorous lessons in surrender, flow, trust, patience, strength, forgiveness (of both self and other), resilience and love are far greater medicine for body and soul than anything we think we have lost. And yes, grieving the Maiden is vital and an ongoing process, but at some point she always makes way for the Mother or the Crone.

So, here are my thoughts on dharma and our collective role of service to our children.

We all have a purpose; a path; a divine contribution; a service we can offer humanity that arises from a place far beyond the mind, body and ego. Sometimes it’s deeply hidden… we have been taught to pack it away, but it’s there nonetheless. When we find it, we rise above the trappings of “I” and melt in devotion to the ever unfolding journey that it takes us on. We step up and serve from deep within our heartspace.

We have been given the message for a long time that heeding our soul’s longing is not the preferred option: attitudes of doing, achievement, success and other measurable concepts pull us away from our intuition and self-knowing. And so, many of us live divided and this plays out in emotional and physical imbalances on multiple levels. But our soul is always communicating in its own language no matter how deeply we push it down. In the dreamtime, altered states, in expansive moments, in those unexpected bursts of creativity, fear, sadness, joy that erase everything except the right here and the right now – the pull of alignment always tries to rearrange. The way we can honour this is to learn to listen, and be brave enough to act accordingly. Be bold enough to let go and jump in. And when it’s truly our path, what we leave behind no longer holds such significance because we have no choice.

Motherhood is among many honourable and undervalued paths of service that mainstream consciousness tells us are more a blip on our road to “achievement” than a deeply devotional embodiment of dharma, compassion, contribution to the whole.

How many times do you hear “I’m just a mother”? I see no ‘just’ about it.

Whether you hold new life but for a few precious weeks, or birth, feed and raise a family, as with every other role of service and care, it is a full-body-full-soul journey that requires every ounce of one’s physical and energetic being.

Enough of the just.

Giving thanks today to every beautiful soul I know living in true alignment and devotion to their purpose; you can tell them apart from the humble radiance and joy that emanate from their being when they’re in their highest flow.

Love,

X

Thank you to the amazing Conscious Dreams Crochet for creating our matching hoods <3

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